Pretty Pretty Pretty

Pretty Pretty Pretty’s Next Top Model August 9, 2008

I make no secret of the fact that despite being a feminist I enjoy watching soul-crushing, deeply unhealthy television, so naturally last week’s final episode of America’s Next Top Model (Cycle 9 ) was a banner occasion, which the delightful Kowhai came over to share with me. One of the challenges that the girls faced in this episode was shooting a video for Covergirl - specifically for Covergirl’s Wet Slicks Fruit Spritzers, and naturally, some of them really really sucked at reading their lines. Thanks to the magic of editing, their attempts were cut into a reasonable ad, but it made us wonder - exactly how hard can it possibly be to remember a tiny little speil and smile at the camera? Well, as it turns out, after a couple of glasses of wine, it’s actually bloody hard. The humiliating video after the jump.
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So cold my lips are turning blue? July 20, 2008

So recently, I’ve had a hankering to have blue lips. Dark, glossy, blue lips. I don’t mean in a gothy kind of way, I just think it would be great to have something really different going on with normal eyeshadow and clothes, to make people do a double-take. The trouble is, blue lip gloss is pretty much impossible to find. So I settled for ordering Lancome Juicy Gelee in Casiss thinking it looked good and dark. I should have gone into Kirk’s and tried it out in real life first though, because in reality, it looks like this:

So you can clearly see how clear that gel is, and how little colour there is in it. But! Next to it you can see the stage makeup that I bought for $3.50 from the Life Pharmacy at the James Smith Corner. It’s a tiny little amount, but I figured I’d try it out first. How well did the trial of mixing the two together go? Judge for yourself. First I put on the blue lipstick:

It was rather difficult to put on, as it went squish, and had a dry, waxy consistency, not unlike crayons. I applied it with my fingers, because I’m not clever and well-stocked with brushes like Amy, and it really dragged. I think in the future, I should cut it half’n half with chapstick, then apply it with a brush. But in this case, putting the lipgloss on top made it feel a little better:

That felt a lot better, but didn’t help keep the blue crayon taste and look off my teeth. I’m very not used to wearing lipstick, obviously, I am all about the gloss.

I put the blue lipstick on with slummy weekend clothes and went to the supermarket. People gave me strange looks. I suspect it would go down a lot better with more makeup (but not over the top eyeshadow), and some fancy clothes somewhere like Mighty Mighty. In fact, I look forward to trying that idea out sometime soon. Now, tell me about some interesting makeup that you’ve done lately, please!

Torrid picking the winner for the win! July 1, 2008

As a fat chick who likes to wear nice clothes suitable for her age that make her feel sexy instead of dressing like a frumpy grandma, I am all about ordering from Torrid, especially when they’re having a 50% off clearance sale as they are right now (I got a pair of velour track pants (I know, I am so OC housewife, but they look coooomfy), a smocked pink hoodie, a pair of flats with dangling skulls, a short-sleeved jacket, a pair of awesome lime green panties and the cutest denim halterneck dress ever for just $80 US + $43 for shipping), but another reason why I’m giving them mad love today is because I saw that they’re selling Team Barack and Team McCain necklaces. Why do I like it so much? Because anti-women’s-rights old McCain comes in second-place silver, while Barack gets the gold. Huzzah!

Oh make me over June 23, 2008

A while ago at Make Up/Over Monday, we decided that we’d set ourselves the challenge of looking different. What this translated to was that Rachel who normally doesn’t wear much makeup at all got the full on loads of bright eyeshadow ala me, and since I normally do my makeup very loose and smudgey, Amy applied mine neat and straight out of Making Faces by Kevyn Aucoin, in the style of “Temptress”, modeled on Barbara Streisand. It was a learning experience for everyone involved!

The results and revelations after the jump.
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Your homework for this weekend June 13, 2008

1. Get yourself a copy of the latest Bust magazine featuring my role model Amy Sedaris on the cover jumping out of a cake, or some other very good form of reading material.
2. Put clean sheets on your bed, preferably 100% cotton, 400 thread count or so.
3. Run yourself a nice hot bath and make sure you put some luxurious products in it (or even just some milk powder, almond oil and a drop of your favourite smelly). Before you get in, apply a nice face mask. Have a jolly good long soak.
4. Scrub your feet with a brush, some pumice, some foot scrub or a combination of all of the above.
5. When you’ve dried off, and removed the mask, slather yourself all over in some glorious thick body butter. I cannot say enough good things about Skinfood’s body butter - they’re a New Zealand company, most of their ingredients aren’t all chemically, it’s rich and lovely, it’s cheap and easy at around $14 a tub in most supermarkets, and if you want further proof of its awesomeness, every time I apply it, my cat licks my hands for ages. So that has to be a good thing, right?
6. Get into your nice clean sheets. Feel blissed out. Perfection!

Review: Aveeno Daily Moisturising Lotion June 4, 2008

I was browsing NZgirl.co.nz the other day, because while every single word on the site is advertorial, they do have a lot of competitions that just require a click to enter, and so I managed to get myself sent a free sample of Aveeno Daily Moisturiser. They sent me some vouchers and a 25ml bottle, which is great, because I am a handcream addict and always have to carry some moisturiser around in my bag, so this is a good size for that.

As far as the product itself goes though, I’m a little less convinced. It claims to last for 24 hours, which I think is ridiculous, because surely you’ll be washing your hands a couple of times during that time. It does a good job of coating your hands in what feels like protective gloves though, and definitely lasts a couple of hours, which is much longer than any most other products. It feels a little greasy going on, and the grease feeling intensifies if your hands heat up. Also, it’s apparently fragrance-free (which is another reason why I don’t like it), but smells kind of vaguely hospital-ish. Oh, and it’s a Johnson & Johnson product, and I prefer to buy from smaller companies, because I have an innate distrust of large chemical corporations claiming to be all about the natural oatmeal properties, when neither the sample nor their website will list the ingredients of the product.

But, you know, if you’re in the market for a really thick hand cream and you don’t want it to smell like cocoa butter or coconut, this could be the product for you. The guy and girl I was with at the pub who tried it with me didn’t have whole lot to say about it, except that it was okay. I’ll keep the bottle around for dry hand emergencies, but won’t be purchasing it.

Our favourite things: body-brushing June 2, 2008

I’ve read in many publications that body-brushing is really good for your skin and circulation, and so I decided to give it a go. The idea is that you give yourself a thorough dry rubdown before you shower evert day, but given that I shower in the morning, approximately 30 minutes after I am supposed to be at work, I don’t have time for that, so it’s generally a weekend-only activity.

What I like best about my brush though, which is made by QVS and was $15 from Farmers, is not the synthetic bristles which are a little too soft, but the fact that it’s got knobs on the back. Ooooooohh yes. This is the perfect thing for feet. Soak them for a while (tonight Amy and I soaked our feet in the bathbombs we made a while ago) and then rub it all over your heels, toes, sides of your feet and oh boy oh boy, it feels good. Your mileage may vary as to the faces of delight it might cause. Mmmmmassagey.

Sephora Spy May 28, 2008

When I was in New York in 2006, my friend took me to Times Square after we’d been drinking, and we went into a Sephora store which was open until midnight. OH MY GOD I nearly died with lust for all the products, and we spent over an hour in there while I agonised over what fragrance Philosophy shower gel to buy (I bought Frozen Lemon Custard eventually) and deciding on Hard Candy and Juicy Tubes Coconut Lipgloss. Going into such luscious shops when you have been drinking is potentially very dangerous, but luckily my need to pee got me out of there before I spent too much money. And it’s okay for me to give you the link because they don’t ship to New Zealand anyway.

But what I really wanted to tell you about was is the Jezebel Sephora Spy series. If you’re not familiar with Jezebel, you should know that it has the tagline “Celebrity. Sex. Fashion. Without airbrushing” and while it does cover many trivial issues, it does have a feminist slant and that sits very well with both my personal taste and my hopes for this site. Their Sephora Spy is an employee of the store who answers questions about their products in a totally bullshit free manner, and is full of good tips, and evaluations of whether or not potions actually do what they claim to, so check it out. And if you’re going to the States any time soon and want to blow your mind, make sure you go to a Sephora.

Taste like me - for super cheap! May 13, 2008

I love me some shiny smelly lip gloss, so awhile ago, I bought a set of three Lancome Juicy Tubes on StrawberrryNet. They were cheap then, but now they’re even cheaper, like crazily so. Of course, by “cheap” I do still mean $15 a tube (and you don’t get to pick your shades), but they’re Lancome, so you’re paying for the brand. But still, the same pack is $66 on the (horrible-named) Man-Trap, and in stores, individual tubes cost around $36 each.

So, my suggestion (and I hope that this doesn’t make you think that we’re paid by StrawberryNet) is that if you think you’re in the market for some fairly subtle glosses, head down to a department store or upmarket chemist and try on the tubes in Melon (pale-ish apricotty pink), Fraise (almost magenta in the tube, but not so much on your lips) and Cerise (my favourite, I wear it like someone who was able to wear red lipstick might, except you know, it’s clear and easy to apply, and only a red tint), and if you dig them, you should place an order. If you want to, that is. Otherwise stick around for my Maybelline Shinylicious review, because if it’s good enough for Martha, it should be good enough for you…

Dud Trades: One woman’s FAIL = another woman’s FTW May 1, 2008

So, we’re all different people, right? And we all have different hair, different skin, different tastes and so on and so forth. Therefore, a product I might like is something you might hate, and a product I hate might be something that you’d love. With that in mind, I’d like to start up a Dud Trades series off PrettyPrettyPretty. First up, I have an almost full bottle of Vo5 shampoo ‘fade defy’ and its matching conditioner.

formulated to strengthen protect and promote a radiant shine promoting your hairs vitality. contains vitamins a, e and provitamin b5 which are released as your hair dreis when you need it most.

$4.89 each, thanks Woolworths online!
I don’t like them because they make my hair dull and limp, but other reviews on the internet offer it some praise, so perhaps it’s right for you. So would you like my shampoo and conditioner? You can have them for free if you pick them up from me, or I’ll send them to you if you send me some dud product you have.