Posts Tagged ‘advertising’

Gives you wings?

August 30th, 2010

A gift basket

I have had the Death Flu of DEATH over the past week, and having my period has made it that much worse. Every time I cough or sneeze or blow my nose, my tampon has shifted around inside me. It’s not like I have a particularly capacious vagina or anything either – as far as I’m aware, anyway. It’s just a sucky part of life.

Another sucky part about having your period? Feeling continually damp. Sure, you’ve got a tampon in to catch the blood and most of the chunks, but yet there’s still “liquid” that escapes. I’m using the very euphemistic term from the accompanying literature because damned if I know what it actually is. It doesn’t seem to be blood. It’s not lady selflubrication. It’s just there and wet and if you wear all cotton underpants they stay wet all day and it’s not comfortable.  But Carefree Flexia think that they can change that for me.

“CAREFREE® Flexia® tampons are the first and only tampons designed with SOFTFOLDS® flexible wings that catch the fluid other tampons may miss. These wings draw the fluid to the inner core of the tampon helping to prevent leakage from the base.”

When they offered to send me out a gift parcel to try the tampons, along with some bath soak and chocolates, of course I said yes. Will the tampons leave me feeling dry? Confident? Carefree? Will I totally be jetskiing around in white togs if I use them? Stay tuned to find out!

Remember – you’re never going to get a promotion without a fresh vag. So do what you gotta to get ahead!

I am a hairy feminist and that’s okay

October 14th, 2008

When I went to Samoa, I was going to write a post about how much fun it was to depilitate my thighs, how satisfying it was to see the huge big clumps of hair washing down the drain, and how great it was that the three-minute-shower-cream that I was using didn’t make my legs smell like roast chicken the way creams in 1996 used to. But I didn’t get around to it, and now there’s no way I’m going to. The reason? Veet Wax’s TV ads that say that waxing makes you more feminine. I’m sorry, but what? WHAT? Get stuffed, how dare you tell me what’s feminine and what’s not? And their slogan “what beauty feels like” – oh silly me, there I was thinking that beauty had to do with feeling good, rather than worrying that you’re not hairless enough to wear what you feel like wearing.

I’m not going to stop shaving my legs (to the knee), but I’m not going to apologise for the parts of me that are hairy either. If you enjoy waxing your legs, by all means, keep waxing your legs (I went through a stage of waxing my toes purely because the pain made me feel), but please, don’t ever think that it’s okay for advertising to play on women’s insecurities about not being feminine enough.

Short bits and wordy considerations

July 8th, 2008

1. Zebrano, home to designer clothes for the curvy lady is having a sale. Pretty much every garment in-store (well, at least in their Johnson Street branch anyway) is reduced, often up to 50%, and arranged in size order for easy shopping. While I’m at it, how do you feel about the term “curvy lady”? I personally don’t like the word ‘lady’ very much so I’m not entirely sure why I’m using it. I ask partially because when Martha wrote about us, she said she doesn’t like the word ‘girly’. How about ‘girlie’ with an ie? But yes, I favour ‘curvy’ over ‘plus-size’, because it celebrates my lovely lovely breasts while we’re at it.

2. If you’re still not reading Jezebel yet, maybe you could start with this post on Badvertising, which demonstrates all the reasons that I pretty much hate magazine advertising (and most magazine copy, for that reason). As a sample, in response to a
Dove campaign for “It’s time we girls cooled off more and freaked out less”, Jezebel writes:

“You know what else makes me freak out? When someone suggests that “we girls” should freak out less. We make less money than men, are expected to be thin and hairless and we have the crampy bleeds every 26 days. A body wash solves nothing. Fuck off.”

And to continue my wordy-thoughts, I pretty much HATE advertising that pretends that the product is “one of us”. I don’t think that the Dove ad was written by someone who has anything in common with me, so they can take their over-familiarisation and shove it.

3. I know we’ve mentioned it before, but Amy and I worked on the giftboxes for our party (which starts at 4pm this Saturday in Newtown, tell your friends!) last night, and man, they are pretty damn awesome if I do say so myself. We’ve also got some foot spas for soaking your tootsies in, the signature cocktail has been designed, and there are piles and piles of clothes for the swap, and all kinds of tasty goodness and decorations have been purchased. We think that you will enjoy yourselves. For those of you who can’t make it because you’re not in Wellington, there will be some giftboxes to be won at a later date. We have many many cunning plans taking shape.