Posts Tagged ‘television’

NZNTM: Cover Girl Week

May 15th, 2009

Okay, first of all. Remember when Kowhai and I made Cover Girl videos a couple of ANTM cycles ago? Well at a hungover drunken New Year’s Day bbq at Amy’s house, I got a couple of more people to give us their best efforts, including Tom:

And Robyn:

And if you watch the behind-the-scenes footage you can watch PPP PAG Hadyn being forced into lipgloss, and who doesn’t want to see that?

But anyways, now, behind the jump, I will put my thoughts on tonight’s episode. Warning – I use a lot of capital letters:

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NZNTM: recapping the recap episode

April 24th, 2009
  • As someone who is friends with mathemagicians, it really offends me when Hosanna says she’s one of only 33 out of ALL OF NEW ZEALAND to make it into the show. Um, the percentage of NZ population > females > females who are the eligible age > females who are the eligible age who care about Top Model > females who are the eligible age who care about Top Model who tried out. Oooh mathy!
  • Again, fake laugh aha aha models eat too.
  • Are we already halfway through the series? Really?
  • Christobelle got stung by a bee. OMG TRAUMA. Actually I shouldn’t mock, cos I’m sure it hurts.
  • “I was really excited when I saw Sara, because Sara is our Tyra”. Ugh!
  • Oh, they got Ajoh to cry talking about her mother. There’s something really disturbing about girls crying in their bathing suits.
  • And di you guys know that Sarah USED TO DO DRUGS? And that Teryl-Leigh IS A MOTHER? Next I bet they say Olivia and Lucy are sisters.
  • Laura thinks eating the chili made her get ahead. Note to everyone next year: his will not work the same way.
  • Dance Montage.
  • There’s a lot been said about the lack of Maori girls representing – there were some in the 33 though.
  • Teryl-Leigh foreshadows that she doesn’t know how she’ll deal if both Hosanna and her get into the top 13.
  • Oh, and if you really wanted to be on Top Model but didn’t make the cut, you could always buy the house instead. If you were selling a home for more than $4.8 million, wouldn’t you want to make sure that you proofread your ad before you posted it? There aren’t any pictures of Tyra Sara included in the sale though, sad face. And no sign of the stripper pole installed in one of the bedrooms.
  • If I could actually fit into their clothes, Top Model would make me actively avoid shopping in Max, I think.
  • I wonder if maybe Sarah got confused by the Jean Batten (I wrote ‘Amelia Earhart’ first, whoops) challenge because she was New Zealand’s “heroine”, and SARAH USED TO INJECT DRUGS.
  • Tiffany goes home for working the pole. And there’s Ajoh getting the wrong end of the black stick. This recap is really really boring – I mean the one on the TV, not my writing. Because I, of course, am hilarious.
  • Comic music for the hip hop class. Again. And SARAH’S DEMONS OVERTAKE HER. This is the episode that Kowhai and I liveblogged so excuse me if I make all the same jokes again. I like CMJ’s pep talk to her though, despite his hair and terrifying hip wiggles.
  • I’ve just noticed that Tery-Leigh was wearing a shirt that says “White by birth, trash by choice”. Well that explains the earrings then…
  • Ajoh gets a piggyback out of Snow Planet, because there’s no snow in Africa. I already made the joke about how it rains there though, right? Sorry.
  • Okay, so you guys know I’m all about the Laura love, right? I think it actually should have been a compliment to the designer that she said her outfit was “comfy”. I mean, given the hurt and pain that some fashion inflicts on us, isn’t it a good thing that your clothes don’t cause you physical discomfort? Also, I think what she meant was “this garment makes me feel confident”, so grr, dumb over-reactions.
  • There’s something about Lucy that really makes me dislike her, but I suspect it’s not about her and more about how she reminds me of someone but I can’t quite put my finger on it. Oh wait! No, I totally can. She totally reminds me of this totally vapid Carrie Bradshaw wannabe that I worked with at Salient. Ahh.
  • I still think Ruby looks better with darker hair. And this talking about chocolate thing is ridiculous. And also the fact that the girls go on about how many kgs they’ve put on since they got in the house. Why and how do they know? Ugh. And Sara’s voiceover: “An intervention was long overdue” – and they bring in exercise equipment. I mean, I get that exercise is a good thing. I even enjoy it myself, sometimes. But might a better intervention also have included a talk on body issues?
  • Wait, Olivia went home? I missed that bit. Either I was drunk or the whole episode didn’t tape.
  • Next, Teryl-Leigh is named and shamed. Wow, who knew that they’d ask the other girls who they think would go home next? It’s almost as if they wanted to stir up some controversy. Surely not? Drama over dinner. I watched this, didn’t I? How do I not remember any of it?
  • “I’m the tallest one here, I’ve got the bone structure. Wow, I have to work on focusing my eyes. They can’t grow any taller!” – That’s totally going to be my come-back from now on.
  • The couture makes me want a bowler hat of my own to rock. Maybe I’m still all about the steam punk.
  • Lucy says that Rebecca Rose and Ajoh both have very good walks because they’re both professional models and have both been taught before. Oh small NZ, how short on amatuers you are!
  • Ajoh doesn’t want to open her legs in circus class. You know this is going to come up again. OH MY GOD! CMJ has ’30s finger-curls. I’m simultaneously awed and terrified. And woah, Ajoh went home? Did I miss a whole episode? Or two? How did that happen? And the next episode features boys. AWESOME. I promise not to miss that one.

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Live-blogging Episode 3 of NZNTM

March 27th, 2009

Kowhai and I took extensive notes watching New Zealand’ Next Top Model tonight. We’ve been drinking. It is not good for womankind. But we had fun anyway…
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